I have to admit that although I love so much of what Thoreau wrote, and did, I've never actually read all of Walden. I had a hard time staying interested in all of his measurements, and descriptions of starting a fire, etc. It's so very cool and admirable, but not always riveting reading. He was, in some ways, a blogger, I suppose. Recording his days, and thoughts, along with every single bit of information about his experiences. That way other people could do it too. Or they could make adjustments to their cabins, or gardens, etc. and stay even longer at Walden Pond.
I really like Thoreau though. I like that he cared so much. He might have been difficult to have at family dinners, but he really cared about what he did. I'm sure he would know where all of his food came from. It would all be organic. It would probably be grown or raised by him. He would always have his own reusable shopping bags and would only shop at Whole Foods, or something even greener. He would sign every petition against Trump and Trump-like behavior. He would probably start a million or so petitions! He would be at every protest march, and probably be Bernie Sanders vice-presidential running mate.
But he cared about the inner man/woman too---not just the community. "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived." This is probably his most famous quote. I love it. He didn't want to find when he died that he had not truly lived. He wanted to live deliberately. Such a buzz-word this day. I read all the time about deliberate parenting, deliberate relationships, deliberate, intentional eating. Thoreau was all about essentialism and mindfulness before it was cool. I have never thought about Thoreau as a mindfulness guru, but I suppose he was. He would be able to lead hugely popular silent retreats in the woods of Massachusetts, and help stressed-out Americans get to know themselves as only a transcendentalist can. He would be able to help people de-clutter their homes and find the "joy of tidying up" like no other!
But because he was born 200 years ago, he would not have called himself a blogger, or a green-liberal political activist, or a mindfulness instructor. He was himself. And he knew himself. And he did what he thought was right. What a guy!
I've had this line from a movie running through my head for weeks, and just this morning I took the time to finally figure out where the quote comes from. I thought it was from Breakfast at Tiffany's at first, but it's not. It comes from one of my favorite movies from my college days: Ever After. I loved that movie. I'd probably still love it, but haven't seen it since I got married. The line is towards the end, when the prince says to Danielle (Cinderella), "I thought if I cared about anything, I'd have to care about everything and I'd go stark raving mad." He then goes on to explain how she has inspired him to care and he's decided to start a university with a huge library where anyone can go to learn.
I understand what he means by that line. I don't know that I completely understood it back in my college days. There is so very much to care about in this world. There are so many petitions to sign, and protests to attend, and people to feed. There is so much bad stuff in the world to care about and try and fix. It can be overwhelming. It can be easier to not care about anything. And loving is scary. Even though perfect love casts out all fear, loving can be scary at first. I worry so much more than I would like to about the safety of my boys, my siblings, my parents, my husband. Caring means great joy and great pain. Caring makes me vulnerable. And it can be exhausting. But I know that it is the only way when I die to find that I have truly lived.
"If I live the life I'm given, I won't be scared to die." To quote some other pretty cool transcendental liberals with long beards, The Avett Brothers.
And I believe that caring about everything and everyone includes caring about myself. If I can know myself and love myself, then I can love others without going stark raving mad.
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